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When the school years ends, how does it make you feel?
This year, I have had a whirlwind of feelings that have sent my emotions into overdrive. A week ago I would have told you that I couldn’t wait for school to be out, to spend time with my kids and get a few things done. Today, all the anxiety of cleaning up more messes, kids constantly arguing and feeling like I can’t get a single thing accomplished had tears streaming down my face. Today, I felt overwhelmed with the months of summer before schools begins again. Tomorrow might be different, but today it made me wonder who else felt the same way?
The picture of my daily routine on repeat!
As I cleaned up messes I didn’t make, picked up all the things that I hadn’t left all over the place, I kept thinking even lecturing to my youngest, “mommy could get so much more accomplished if everyone would clean up after themselves”. As I picked up every stray sock, cup, glass, or toy, I found myself cursing and wishing I could just have one day that I didn’t have to clean up somebody else’s mess. One day, is that really too much to ask!?
The breaking point…
As the tears flowed down my face. The frustration of what seemed like an endless task. A rush of thoughts and emotions went through my head like a tornado ripping through a small town. In short, I was a complete and udder mess and at my wit’s end!
As time quickly ran out, I finished doing the last few things I could before heading to school to pick up my other two kids. After picking up the kids, I had to briefly attend a retirement party before heading home to greet some workers waiting at my house. During this time I felt like my day had ended as lost cause, feeling stuck in a never-ending abyss of constant to do’s. A world of never-ending things that needed to be done!
When I got home, the stress and anxiety hit me one more time! Consequently, I let out a sigh, unlocked the door and went inside. I didn’t even have the heart to greet the workers. Once I was inside I started the coffee pot. While it was brewing, I barked off a few orders to my kids and folded a load of laundry. When the coffee was done, I made a cup and decided it was time to figure out a different way to get things done. Grumpy and frustrated, I took my coffee out to the pool deck and had a sit down “how do I change this moment”.
The next step…
Just when I was getting my list of how to change this going, my daughter came out with socks on her feet and no shoes. My thought immediately moved to the pure frustration of good socks getting dirty or ruined. I barked off an order to “get shoes on or take the socks off!” And, my stubborn little girl proceeded to pull her socks off and set them down on the play set. My mind was blown, completely off the rails, my thought “I knew it, just take them off and throw them down”. Feeling like a bull with steam rolling out of the nostrils, I harshly barked off another order to “put the socks where they belonged!” Grumbling a few words, she proceeded to put them where they belonged and came back outside to play.
To my own surprise, I realized I was an exhausted momma that was not having one of her best days… In fact, I needed to take my own advice and just “chill out”.
After all, this child, although begrudgingly, had done what I asked.
And as a result was sitting on the pool deck watching my two youngest play… still feeling frustrated, but no longer overwhelmed…
I soon realized my two little kids would get bigger and do more on their own just like their older brother.
But what became even more apparent was this momma, right now, needed to take a deep breath and have a time out of her own!
Suddenly, like a blink of an eye, today became just one bad day in a sea of good and precious moments!
As a result, I sit to remind all the momma’s that find themselves overwhelmed, you’re not alone! And on these days be kind to yourself and dig deep to find your bright light and blessings!
In short, take the time to reflect, regroup and pull it back together. In the end it’s the sea of good and precious moments that really matter! 🙂