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Those that Ruin Our Day!
I have often wondered why we spend so much time on people who always seem to ruin our day! I had someone recently send me a message basically saying “thank you for believing in me”. After that message I started thinking, why do we spend so much time letting others bring us down instead of lifting us up? Furthermore, why does it have such a profound impact on our life?
Before I go on, I will apologize right now for going so far off topic on my blog. My heart just wouldn’t let this one go!
Overall, most people have a stronger reaction to someone who would rather tear us down that lift us up. For example:
- The person who always wants to argue.
- The bully who has nothing better to do than pick on someone else.
- A group of people that purposely leave someone out just because they can.
- A person that passes judgement on someone before they have even made an effort to get to know them.
- Or, someone who is having a bad day and takes it out on you.
I could go on forever with these type of examples and I am sure you could add a heaping helping as well! However, that isn’t going to answer the question or solve the problem of why we tend to focus on the negative aspects of life instead of the positive ones. The answer is quite simple, anything negative instinctively triggers our emotions. Additionally, our flight or fight response kicks in as soon as we feel threatened emotionally or physically. Once that happens, we then either try to discount the event in our minds or we go to those that support us to make everything better, even if it is just for a moment.
Now, the question becomes, “Why do we have such a hard time letting go of these occurrences or events?” The answer is simple, we have been hurt or feel injured. Whether it is our pride, self-esteem, confidence or something else, we have been injured and that is something that is hard to get over! This is why we spend so much time allowing these things ruin our day, life, etc.
However, what would happen if we spent more of our time focusing on those that spent their time making our day better? For example:
- My friend and former co-worker that sent me the uplifting message because I gave them encouragement.
- Someone who stopped to help pick up your groceries when the bag busted open.
- The friend that reminded you that you I am here for you when you have a bad day or need support.
- Your group of friends or family that accept you the way you are and wouldn’t trade you for anything else.
- That random stranger that gave you a nice complement.
- Or, a loved one or friend that has always stood by you and supported you no matter what happened.
What if we spent more time appreciating those that have influenced our lives and made them better. Moreover, what if we refused to let the negative have such an impact on our lives. And finally, what happens to the notoriety of all those people who spend their time trying to ruin another persons day? The answer is simply that the negative becomes more insignificant and less likely to have a major impact on our lives.
My friend and former co-worker, among many others have had such a profound impact on my life that I would be doing such a disservice to them if I gave more credit and time to someone trying to tear me down. I encourage everyone to remind themselves and focus on all the positive people in their lives, especially when you come across the few that would want to tear you down! In addition, celebrate those that have supported and encouraged you throughout you life! And most of all, thank them, they are the reason you are who you are!
*My final thoughts: In a world full of roses, don’t focus on the thorns!
How do you celebrate the people who inspire you? What do you do when you encounter a negative people? Drop me a line and tell me all about it.